August 3rd

Can you believe it? Two thirds of the year has already gone by. It seemed like only yesterday when I walked into my dorm room as a freshman. OK, maybe not yesterday- but what I'm trying to say is, time flies. Which means, it won't be long till 2009 rolls in, and everything will change!

The reason I'm reminiscing is because, I'm not ready to handle the next few months. The next couple of months will determine my future. During this time, I'll be sitting 13 exams, doing 4 presentations, reading 24 clinical papers, and performing a research in astigmatism.
I guess the only thing I can do is to take things as it comes. But boy, I hope I come out of it alive!

As I promised, I will write about "Shelter". (This blog does a good quick rundown of the story.)

Let's start with the positive.
Trevor Wright did a superb job playing Zach, the main character. I'm always impressed with young actors who can convey such emotion through their work. It made the movie meant so much. Without him, the story might not have been as successful.

And now to the negative.
This movie felt very disjointed. The scenes did not flow from one to another. Yes, the message did get through to the audience, but it was not delivered with flare. I can't help but find that they did a bad job at editing the movie.

But the really cool things about this movie is: it reminded me of how difficult it was when I realize I was gay. After being out for 1+ year, I've forgotten how much I've learnt, and where I used to be. After watching this movie, I had a chance to reflect on the "Why me?" feeling I used to have. I feel privileged to have had such an experience. It wasn't a nice feeling, but if I haven't had gone through my coming out, I wonder if I would have been an ignorant, persecuting freak.

After coming out, I felt justified to "play" around. It seems like most gay people do, and is part of the gay culture to be promiscuous. Lately I've been thinking, being gay doesn't mean things have to change. It doesn't mean you have to go out and do what gay people do, and be a stereotypical gay (if that exist). I really felt that the movie conveyed a sense of relationship between the two main characters. It showed that being gay is not about sodomy, but the uniqueness of having the ability to experience a deep loving relationship with the same sex.
What I'm trying to get at is, the movie encouraged me to focus on having meaningful bonds with a guy before jumping into bed with him. Because we're all unique individuals, and we're worth more than just a quick fuck to someone else.

July 31st

So anyway, I thought I'd share a few things I got in the mail today....

(1) An Email from my ISP:

Hi "jeremy"

During the last billing month your broadband data usage was: 20.01367188 GB

This is a friendly notification that 20.01367188 GB exceeds what we consider reasonable usage on the ZeroShock broadband data plan. Under the reasonable use policy we reserve the right to move you off this plan if you continue to use in excess of 20 GB (Gigabytes).

The Orcon Team

OH DEAR! What do I do guys? I went over by 0.01367188 GB!!!! And they're threatening to move me to another plan if I keep being naughty, dowloading all those big porn files.

Seriously! 0.01367188GB?

(2) Shelter DVD

This "coming out" movie had been widely reviewed. So I thought I'd buy it and check it out. It took four weeks on back order!

I'll give you an update on how it is once I've watched it.

June 7th

So yesterday was my "last day of semester".  Well, not really. Its my last day before I go on my "working holiday" to Sydney next week. (I will have my proper holiday, after my working holiday.)

I was schedule for my hospital rotation yesterday. We all reported in on time, but the receptionist was clueless why we were there (as always). We've been going to the hospital for over a few months now, but they're still not sure which doctor we will be training under for that day.

The receptionist knows nothing, the nurses run around trying to sort things out, and eventually a senior doctor had to come in and help sort out the administrative mystery. (I would have thought it was a simple task of "oh yes, Dr. A is expecting you in room 21")

But anyway, it was all worth the wait, because after about an hour, I was introduced to a very camp ophthalmologist. Blonde hair, blue eyes, tight aqua blue polo. He said hi with a tone that made my gaydar ring alarm bells- it might have been a false alarm, but we will never know.

He quickly changed into scrubs, and we started seeing patients. His cross-leg really just confirmed it so much more.

Here comes the confusing part. During break, which he calls "Mrs. Brown" (isn't that gay?), the nurses were asking him about his girlfriend. He then chats about how he's broken up with "the girlfriend from Christchurch" and has a new one now.

I was of course a little disappointed, because really, he should be my boyfriend. 

So I'm left wondering if he's using girlfriend as a synonym for boyfriend. These two words have the same core meaning- i.e. partner; which of course can be mixed around to keep ones private life discrete (this is especially important in a hospital situation, where nurses live on gossip).

So Dr. A, if you're reading this, I hope you drop a line and clarify this confusion. 

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Yesterday night, GB and I went to watch Sex and the City. 

The whole cinema was filled with giggling girls and very few couples.

This movie was OK. I can't say I found it absolutely entertaining. I felt this movie was really meant for girls only. The shoes, the wedding, the dresses, the straight men. It just didn't click for me.

However I did have a favourite scene, and that is when Samantha walks out of the fashion show from Bryant Park and got spilled by an animal activist with red paint chanting "fur!, animal killer" (or something along those lines).

I was expecting Samantha to say "Fuck", but instead she smiled and said "This is why I love New York".